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Vote Now: Most Memorable Frequent Flyer ✈️

Vote Now: Most Memorable Frequent Flyer ✈️

September 17, 2024

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Whatsup MuFKRs? 👋

Welcome to another issue of "Is It an Emergency?", a place where healthcare workers commiserate about the insanity that is our every day. Here, we provide a weekly peek at the chaos of the ER.

So, grab your favorite 5 o’clock drink, and we’ll dive into those “you can’t make this shit up” stories

Cast your vote for the most memorable frequent flyer! 🗳️

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Peanut Butter Flyer 🥜📢

Ooo we call him “peanut butter” man. Frequent flyer. Guy is AOx4 (somehow) but just refuses to use the call light for anything. Instead screams for the nurse every 10-15 minutes at the top of his lungs …to ask for peanut butter. He likes to hide food in his linens for later and throws a tantrum when you make him wipe his own ass. Truly a wonderful human.

Ostomy Madam Flyer 🏥💋

Had a paraplegic pt who had an ostomy. Had all these really HOT MEN bringing her gifts and visiting her all.the.time.. She was actually really nice, but it turns out she was using the hospital as a cheap motel for her prostituting the use of her ostomy for sex kinks. So yeah, she got banned from further "visitors" and turned into a raging bitch because we were ruining her business.

Cow Patty Flyer 🐄💩

I had an alcoholic homeless regular who would habitually leave us “cow patty” compressed dried poops that would dispense out of his pant legs every time we did an ambulation challenge. He would also only respond with, “GOD DAMN IT” for any questions, requests, interactions. Honestly sort of miss that guy

👉 Cast Your Vote

Cast your vote for the most memorable frequent flyer! 🗳️

“Never trade holidays with someone who's been there less than a year if the holiday you have to work comes first. That bitch will leave after that holiday and you'll be fucked.”

More “you won’t find this in a textbook” nursing tips.